


Leave a Light On

by ecotone



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Gen, south will fight a man for basically any reason
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-02
Updated: 2016-06-25
Packaged: 2018-05-30 16:18:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,894
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6431461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ecotone/pseuds/ecotone
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“You need to slow down,” North tells her. “And you need to <em>set your trackers</em>."</p>
<p>=</p>
<p>An AU where South gets Theta. Things go better than expected.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. project freelancer

South does not know how to be an older sister.

North is her twin, but he is also three minutes older. Those three minutes had convinced North that South needed to be sheltered, that he needed to do everything he could for her. They will never quite be equal, South knows. Anything can happen in three minutes.

An AI, though. That could level the playing field. South thinks about the leaderboard, about how strained her relationship with North has become.

He is, of course, next to her when she wakes up. Even though she’s on what feels like ten different painkillers, South is coherent enough to realize that there’s someone _in her brain_ , rifling through everything. It feels like a child, poking around while their mother’s back is turned. She hisses, and the presence startles.

South is reminded of a version of herself, one from decades ago, and feels her heart soften just a bit for this, this _child_ of an AI. North looks at her, concerned. Always worried, he is. South frowns a bit.

“Hey, sis, it’s good you’re awake. All the doctors have been monitoring your vitals, but they still have a few questions. You feel okay?"

“Yeah, yeah, I’m alright. You don’t have to stay here all night worrying.”

“All right, kiddo, I’ll get out of your hair, though I’ll be back later with some food. Yell if you need anything." North looks like he wants to stay a bit longer, but South knows he'll leave eventually. After all, her vitals are steady, and he has training soon.

South nods, letting her eyes drop again. The presence in her head realizes that she is watching it and blinks off. She calls out to it, but it comes out as a mumble.

==

There is a doctor in her room the minute she wakes up again. All told, three different doctors come to see her, all with different questions. South would be more annoyed, but she’s too busy trying to coax the child in her head to show itself. Well, that and the fact that North had brought her some of the chocolate York had snuck aboard their last shore leave.

“You said the one I got's Theta, right?” South looks at the Counselor, the newest addition to her bedside. He's only interested in South and North’s relationship, which South is mildly concerned about.

“That is correct. Agents North and Washington will be assigned an AI in the coming weeks, though the exact order has yet to be determined."

“Sweet. Now, how do I make the little guy show his face? I have to show North and the other dudes. Delta will want info."

“Communication between AI units is not allowed, Agent South."

“I know, I know. Now, how do I let the kid know I’m not gonna bite him?"

South Dakota is cleared for duty the next day, mostly because she had refused to stay in bed for any longer. The thing in her head agrees, mostly because it can’t stand laying around for another day.

==

“This little dude is Theta,” South says proudly. “He’s finally coming out of his shell."

“Nice,” York says. Delta looks on over his shoulder.

"That one's smaller than Delta," Wash complains. "Is it because he's a kid? Why'd they give a kid to you? I mean, you don't seem like the type to like children."

"I used to babysit with North," South says. "I watched half the kids and he watched the other half. Made more money that way."

York grins. "Smart," he says, nodding approvingly. "Hopefully the little one'll take after you."

"I don't think I want to be near a six year old who knows how to kill me twelve different ways," Wash mutters.

Shortly after, North looks down at his sister being tested, Wash and York standing beside him.

“Theta’s... _childlike_ nature is what led to him being paired with Agent South,” the Counselor says. “We believed that it would be a challenge, one that would help South grow as a person and as a soldier."

“You’d think that the caregiver would be you,” Washington snarks, bumping North with his elbow. “Being the eldest and all."

North snorts. “Yeah, by three minutes. Besides, South’s just as much of an adult as I am. She has what it takes to take care of an AI."

South passes her test with flying colors.

==

“You heard about this Alpha thing?” South asks York, her elbows on the table. “I mean, Delta ever think about it or anything?"

“Yeah, he’s thought about it quite a bit. Why, Theta too?"

“What’s an Alpha?” Wash says, muffled from the food in his mouth. Across from him, North snorts.

==

Using equipment in the field is a lot easier with an AI, South discovers.

“The best offense is a good defense,” North shouts, throwing his bubble. Theta blinks as he works to maintain the shield, trying to keep North from cooking in his armor.

“No, you’ve got it backwards. The best _defense_ is a good _offense_ ,” South says.

“Just fire your gun!"

“See? Offense."

==

Theta does not rest easily.

His sleep is fitful at best, and even then South is still bothered by the feedback. It’s like having a roommate who won’t shut up and go to bed, South thinks tiredly.

 _Sorry_ , the AI transmits. It sounds like a mutter.

“S’alright, lightbulb,” South says aloud, voice thick with sleep. “Happens to the best of us. Wanna walk around or something?"

South is reminded of late night car rides, being driven around the neighborhood by her parents as she struggled to sleep. South is reminded again of herself as a child, young and curious and hopeful. Her edges had sharpened over the years, a defense mechanism brought on by growing up in a world she never quite fit into. In the back of her mind, she hopes that never happens to Theta. Eternal childhood, or whatever.

South finds Carolina in the training room and joins her. They have never been friends, not really, but that didn’t matter on the field. You just needed someone who wouldn’t get you killed.

==

“ _What_?” South screeches.

“I thought I was supposed to be the angry one here,” North sighs.

“Yeah, South, don’t you already have an AI?” Washington looks like he wants to hide in his locker.

She doesn’t kick the bench over, but it’s a close thing.

“It’s the principle of it,” she mutters. Theta doesn’t show himself, but South can feel his worry.

“Hey,” North says calmly, in the way he used to try and calm her down. “If I’m not mad, you don’t have to be mad for me. I know offense is in your job description, but we can both take care of ourselves. I don’t have to watch over you, and you don’t have to be angry for me."

“You’re never angry, though. You’re the world’s most passive aggressive being ever."

“Tell that to the dude he _shot in half_ ,” Wash says.

==

Washington loses his mind.

Epsilon is a failure. The Director doesn't say it, but all of his agents know.

York and the twins take turns watching him.

"It's all right, dude," South says, slumped over in the chair North had dragged to Wash's bedside. She isn't sure if she's talking to Theta or Washington.

Wash mutters something about a skateboard, and South hears Theta's code strain with the decision of whether to laugh or cry.

==

Tex goes rogue.

York and the twins go with her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know why my brain thought a good first longfic would be something that would shatter current canon. It's fun to write, though. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯  
> Comments much appreciated! Thank you for reading!!


	2. recovery one

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Washington finds the twins.  
> Not before the Meta does.

When the Project implodes, South and North both join Texas’ cause. North trusts York and Tex, and South is not about to lose Theta. Besides, there are worse people to break out of the Project with.

The _Mother of Invention_ crashes. There is not enough time to find York and Tex, but there is enough time for South to pick herself off of the ground and run, North close behind.

They do not stop until it is too dark to see, both running on what adrenaline they can still muster and all of the energy Theta can divert to their speed units. He keeps jumping from South’s implants to North’s armor, trying to help both of them at once.

“Maybe we’re triplets,” North says once they’ve stopped for the night, his laugh a wheeze. “One connected mind or whatever."

“I wish we could do that,” South groans, leaning against a tree. Her armor felt heavier than it usually did, especially without an AI to lighten the load. “Woulda made bank as kids."

“Is there a market for that?"

“We coulda made one,” South laughs and slides down the tree. “Good place to stop and sleep? Yes? Alright."

“I’ll take first watch then,” North sighs, smiling tiredly. “Hey Theta, can you help me out? I’m a bit frazzled, and I don’t want anyone coming after us.” He thinks of Maine, of whatever he was becoming. Had become, he thinks, remembering Carolina’s fall. “You, mostly."

“Will do,” the AI said, blinking into existence beside him.

The twins survive like this for a few months, nervously waiting for the Meta to show itself, listening to the PFL radio channels for any signs of trouble, taking turns staying up all hours of the night.

South only hopes that everyone else- York, Tex, Carolina, whoever else went MIA- is alright. She blames the sentimentality on sharing a brainspace with Theta for so long. And hey, there are worse side effects.

==

They're alive because they are lucky.

They were in some abandoned building, the three of them, when Maine had found them.

Theta had not been with South; he had been in North’s armor, trying to make the bubble shield easier to use.

Maine-- his shell, the Meta, Sigma’s flesh train, whatever-- didn’t know this until South was on the ground, struggling under its boot.

“Empty,” Sigma hissed. Maine growled.

South had always been the more clever twin.

“Car-Carolina,” she had gasped. “Found us, half mad with no AI in her head. She took Theta, said he was needed or something. That’s the last we saw of her. We didn’t ask questions because she had a gun pointed at us and she seemed inclined to use it."

Maine growled, raised his foot, and her world went black.

==

When South wakes up, she is rather surprised. Mostly because she hadn’t thought that she was going to _be_ getting up.

North has a pretty bad stomach injury, she discovers, but he'd managed to get to South's healing unit while she was sleeping; Theta had patched him up with that.

One problem: both of their Recovery beacons were going off.

“While I’m glad we’re alive, I don’t think that’s a good sign,” South moans, slowly sitting up. Her head was pounding, though she couldn’t tell if it was from the blunt force trauma or the beacons' incessant beeping. “Also, you could have just asked me for my unit. I woulda given to you, ya know.”

“Oh, uh. Please?” Theta tries, North laughing weakly behind him.

“Alright, alright. We have bigger problems, I think. Who’s still around HQ that could be a Recovery Agent?"

“Uh, Carolina, Wyoming, Washington, and Florida? I think?” South shrugs. “Carolina’s probably MIA, though, after that fall."

“Fall?” Theta asks. South curses; Theta had been too busy jumping bodies to see what both the Dakotas had.

North, thankfully, recovers and answers for her. “Something happened to Maine, though I'm not sure what. He took Carolina’s AI and then, well. Dropped her off a cliff,” he finishes lamely.

"Hence the assault," South sighs, rubbing at her head. 

“Oh," Theta says meekly.

“Yeah, oh,” South agrees. “But Carolina’s made of steel and spite, so she probably made it back somehow. My money’s on her or Wash, though-- wait."

“What?" North asks, sitting up straighter. He's worried, South can tell, even though she's just got a headache and he's got a hole in his stomach. 

“Recovery agents come and get your tech and AI off your dead body, right? ‘Lina’s probably still ‘untrustworthy,' considering she just got her AI ripped out of her head- if she even made it back."

“So that means it’s probably Wash. After Epsilon, I’d bet he wouldn’t want to touch an AI with a ten foot pole. They probably pushed him out of his hospital bed to deal with this mess."

South groans. “At least we’re alive and kicking."

==

Agent Washington arrives a while later. South regrets not starting up a betting pool for it.

Thankfully, Wash is inclined to help them- mostly because he knows about as much as they do. He disables both of their beacons and calls Command.

“Agents North and South Dakota KIA,” Washington says. “AI designated Theta and equipment both missing."

“Affirmative,” his radio replies, and the line goes dead.

“Okay, so _what_ is going on? This is a shitshow to end all shitshows,” South says. She hasn’t stopped pacing since she could stand without feeling like she was going to black out again. “And was that 479er? Damn, she sounded bored. Guess there aren’t many uses for a pilot nowadays."

“Sigma did something to Maine, convinced him to help him steal all of the AI,” Washington says. “Something about becoming human. Been killing everyone, too, once their AIs are assimilated or whatever.” Wash narrows his eyes. “How did you manage to keep Theta?"

“Clever talking,” South says. “Told him Carolina had beat him to the punch. No AI here.”

“Smart,” Wash says approvingly. “Now, do you to want to come with us?"

“Us?” South says, instinctively reaching for her gun.

“Oh, Christ, sorry! I’m not gonna kill you or anything, Jesus. Delta, I mean. Delta’s with me."

“And York--“ North starts, then stops. “No, don’t tell me." South's frown deepens.

“Sorry,” Wash says, wincing. “Anyways, want to come?"

“Sure, why not? Everyone’s either dead or out to get us, might as well have some fun.”

==

The Meta finds them again. It sucks.

Washington had given Delta to North, something about him being more familiar with AI equipment. Neither of the Dakotas had pushed it.

Now, Wash is lying on the ground in front of them, not dead but pretty close. North’s bubble is up, but it’s not quite enough.

Time to be a good Samaritan, South thinks. She gives Wash their healing unit, and the twins get the hell out of dodge.

A few hours later, they stop running. South thinks about that day from months ago, the one when the _MOI_ had crashed.

This is the worst kind of deja vu, she decides.

“Okay,” North says, trying to muster up some of the authority he’d had back in the Project. It’s a weak attempt, but South lets him try. “Nothing on the comms about a Freelancer that was KIA. Plus, he didn’t have any AI, or any equipment outside of that healing unit."

“We didn’t hear anything about York,” South mutters.

“Agent York went rogue. Outside of his beacon, the Project did not know of his whereabouts,” Delta says from his position next to North’s shoulder. “Agent Washington is- or was, in a worse case scenario- still part of the Project."

“Thanks, Delta,” Theta says, as sincere as he can manage. “That makes sense."

“I was created to think logically,” Delta says simply.

“I’m glad you’re here to do that for us,” South says, sitting against a short tree. “I’ve got first watch tonight. Delta, your scanners anything more fancy than Theta’s?"

“I may be of some assistance,” Delta replies, appearing next to her.

“Great.” South pulls Theta, plugging Delta into her port as North puts Theta into his armor.

“Night, kid,” she calls to Theta.

“Night,” he choruses with North. South snorts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> had most of this done, so it just took some edits & it was ready to go. next chapters are getting into Plot Stuff, so they may take a bit longer. 3's coming along, though, so it shouldn't be any longer than a week.
> 
> thank you for reading! comments/questions always welcome.


	3. reconstruction

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> memory is the key.

“So I found Wash,” South says casually.

“What the _hell?_ ” North asks, less casually.

“What? Radio chatter showed that he got picked up by Command, and after that it was just a matter of figuring out where he’d been sent. With a little help,” she admits, glancing at where Delta had appeared beside her.

“Thank you for the acknowledgment,” Delta says. North snorts.

“Yeah, yeah. I did most of it, we both know."

“I, being an embodiment of intelligence, find that _highly_ unlikely."

“Is that what we’re calling you now?"

==

Everything comes to a head at Outpost 48-A.

The twins follow Wash for a few more days, despite Theta’s constant stream of “He’s right there! We could go say hi!"

They don’t follow him to Valhalla, though North (and Theta) wants to.

“Listen to me, and listen to the radio! We’re on the record as KIA, and that crash site is gonna be swarming with Agents. We wouldn’t get within a hundred feet of Wash _or_ that site."

North sighs. “Alright, I’ll follow your lead on this one."

“It’s nice to have my cleverness acknowledged every once in awhile."

“You sound like Delta."

As if he was called, Delta blinked over South’s shoulder. “We have a problem."

“Is that problem growling like a rabid bear?"

“I’m afraid so."

==

“Okay, sis, can your clever brain think us up a way to get out of this?” North asks from inside his bubble shield. He still had his, and South had been given hers after she was implanted. Theta had called them “double bubble” for several weeks.

“ _Actually_ , yes. One Recovery Agent, coming up! Guess who was _clever_ enough to keep her beacon?"

“You?” Theta asks.

North sighs. “Oh, focus on your shield."

The Meta growls at them. South sticks her tongue out under her helmet.

Somewhere, Washington gets a message.

==

“Glad you could join us,” South shouts.

“ _What_ is happening?” Wash shouts back. “Just- never mind! Stop the Meta, before he gets away!"

“Keep your shield up,” South calls to North. “If we don’t, he might just kill us and run."

North nods. A bullet ricochets off of his bubble.

“Sorry!” a Simulation Trooper, the one that had been tailing Wash, calls.

“I might just want to die now,” South mutters.

Time stops. She wonders how long it would take her to flip the Meta off. Reggie, too, for good measure; it was his stupid equipment.

==

“Okay,” Wash says. “What?"

“I’m guessing that healing unit did you a world of good,” South says, grinning. “Gonna introduce us?"

“Oh, uh, sure. South, meet Caboose. Caboose, Agent South Dakota.” Wash looked sideways at her. “And the AI unit-"

“Delta,” the AI says, flashing back into reality. South had shut him off to conserve power, but she guessed he wanted to make an entrance. “A pleasure to meet you."

Wash nods. “Also, Agent North Dakota, presumably with the AI Theta."

North waves, tilting his head at Theta as he came back online. Theta copies him, waving excitedly.

South snickers. “Neither of them have met new people in awhile.” North swats at her helmet.

“Alright, so who was gonna introduce _me_?"

“Oh,” Wash says, “this is Church.”

“Thanks, asshole."

South laughs. “Hey, Wash? I like your new friends."

==

“The Meta was previously the Freelancer Agent Maine,” the voice at Command says.

“We figured that out, like, _months_ ago,” South hisses. “Christ. I wish I could tell ‘Niner to just quit and steal a Pelican."

==

“Alright, so Zanzibar,” South says. “Sounds like either a vacation destination or a mini golf place.”

“Vacation? That sounds great!!” the dark blue one- Caboose?- shouts. “You can _golf while you’re on vacation_!"

“For the love of God, Caboose, _shut up_.”

“We’re here,” Washington announces.

South elbows her brother. “Switch."

Theta greets her, and she grins. Delta’s too analytical, she thinks.

She can hear the Sim Troopers bickering, and she thinks of the Project.

Well, three out of ten isn't too horrible.

==

She is going to _decimate_ the Meta. South Dakota, back from the proverbial dead, will be the one to absolutely _destroy_ \--

“Just- just be glad it wasn’t Theta,” North sighs weakly. “Besides, Delta knew what was going to happen. Had a message and everything."

South tries to focus on North, to ignore Theta’s scared wailing in her brain. “What was that?"

“The message? _Memory is the key._ "

“Well. That is too cryptic and I am too tired. Night."

With that, South Dakota passes out. North groans and lays back down.

“For the first time in forever, splitting up was not the worst idea ever,” he mumbles. Someone snorts, and it sounds like York.

==

“Sorry,” Wash tries. It sounds half like a question and half like he just found North's pet fish floating upside down.

“Hey, Washington?” The voice was coming from one of the Simulation Troopers, but South wasn’t sure which.

“Yes?” He asks.

“Shut up."

==

“ _Memory is the key_ ,” North repeats. “Why was he so _cryptic_?"

“You’re asking the wrong people,” South says, tiredly. She feels like those week-old leftovers York always kept in the communal fridge after a shore leave. Well. if they'd been hit be a truck. Or Niner's Pelican.

“Maybe it’s the keyword for some top-secret launch codes,” Theta tries. He hasn’t been talking much since the Meta got Delta, so South tries not to be too snarky with him.

“I know Wyoming tried to convince you otherwise, but we’re not in a Bond movie."

“Hey, guys,” Wash says, “I might know what Delta meant."

“Launch codes?"

==

Their plan to get into the facility is ridiculous, but it works.

South refuses to leave without Wash.

“Look,” she hisses at him, “they- it, _whatever_ \- took Delta, and it tried to take Theta. It needs to be put in its place. The Troopers can take Theta with Epsilon. It’ll be good for him, and all of them, to learn about the Project, anyway. They were a part of it, too, no matter how much we all like to run away from the thought. Okay?"

Spite is a hell of a motivator, she thinks. Washington sighs.

“Alright,” he says. “Alright. North?"

North looks at his sister, tall and stronger than she’d ever been, calling the shots and refusing his protection. Beneath his helmet, he smiles.

“You lead and I’ll follow,” he says to South. Her grin is like a knife.

==

In the end, they are arrested with Agent Washington.

The EMP goes off without a hitch. The Alpha is gone. South feels a little regretful; the dude was kind of an ass, but so is she. Gotta stick together.

“Gotta say, death was better than this,” South laughs from her cell.

Later, the three of them are given an offer they can’t refuse. South agrees immediately. Wash wants freedom, but she wants something else entirely.

“What was that?” North whispers to her. He looks worried, concerned that whatever had gotten into Wash and stuck was getting at her.

“Revenge-in-progress,” she hisses back. This time, North can see her face. “Besides, I’ve got a kid waiting for me. No prison breaks- for _now_."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fun fact -- I had Theta being taken along with Delta written, but eventually i realized that the Meta never got Epsilon so, hey, what's one more missing fragment? Delta still had to get taken for the whole "memory is the key" thing, though.
> 
> Sorry for such a delay between chapters!! I've been playing a lot of games and pointedly avoiding my Evernote, lmao. Either way, comments / questions always welcome! Thank you for reading, as always :0


	4. recollections

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes, things go according to plan. 
> 
> This is not the plan.

The Meta hates her; she can feel it in the way he stares at her. South tries not to think to hard about it, and blocks out every memory she still has of Maine.

Theta is somewhere, waiting for her. With any luck, he’ll stay away from the ghost that wants him, the one that contents itself with haunting her.

==

Wash gives the twins captive-watching duty. South is not pleased. Then again, she usually isn’t these days. Maybe Theta was the thing that kept her from going full-on asshole years ago, she thinks idly.

“Listen,” she says the moment Washington and the Meta are out of earshot, grabbing the prisoner Wash had given them. “We’re here to help you. Well, _I’m_ here to destroy that thing that killed my friends, and you happen to benefit from that. North’s here to help you. He's a bleeding heart, it’s bad for business."

“Uh,” the captive croaks. Maroon was, what, Simmons or something? He hadn’t been able to look directly at her when they met. He still couldn’t, though now it was for different reasons.

“Got it? Good,” she snaps. “Sorry about the pink one and the robot, I guess. Couldn’t exactly stop it."

The Sim Trooper calls in a medic, as per Washington’s orders. South braces herself for any additional stupidity.

==

“Well, the screaming certainly did something,” South tries. North sighs.

They head for the desert with Washington, their captive, and what remains of the Meta. She hopes that wherever Theta is, the weather is a bit nicer.

“Well,” Washington says. He sounds like he wants to put someone through a wall. South looks sideways at the medic.

“Whatever. Let’s fix this stupid unit and get going.” She kicks at an alien’s corpse. “Shisno,” she grumbles.

“Any objections?” Wash asks.

“Us or the prisoner?” North replies. “I think both answers are no.”

They continue the hunt. 

==

“Even from the grave, Tex manages to outsmart us all,” South says, grinning through her teeth. She knows she should at least be _acting_ upset, but this is the end. No more following the peanut gallery around and acting like she was on a side remotely close to Washington’s.

“I’m still glad I didn’t sign up for that three-on-one match,” North says. The Meta growls.

The Meta betrays them first. There go all of her plans for a dramatic reveal.

“ _How_ did he manage to kill Tex?” South shouts through the snow.

“It wasn’t the real Tex, I don’t think,” North calls back. “Watch out!"

The Meta is coming for her, now, too. She looks at Tex’s body for a second longer and thinks about the Project. Tex’s cracked helmet casts an eerie shadow, strikes an uncomfortable parallel.

“Sorry, buddy,” South hisses. “This one’s for York."

She is not the least bit sorry.

==

The unit shuts down. Somewhere, Maine is drowning, without Sigma or anything else plaguing his mind. Maybe that’s what he- it?- wanted.

“Hey, kid,” South tries. Theta blinks up at her.

“Thanks for keeping him safe,” she tells the Sim Trooper that had given him back to her. She’s fairly certain it’s the one everyone calls Caboose. She isn’t sure if it’s a surname or a particularly mean joke.

“You are very welcome!! He talked about you very much. Also, he wants a dog."

“You know what? After all this, that isn’t the worst idea."

“I have another idea!” he all but shouts.

“And what is that?”

“How would you like to join Blue Team?"

“No way!” one of the Reds shouts. South thinks it’s the orange one. “You guys have already had Tex on your team, and now you’re getting Washington. Why are we always screwed over when it comes to Freelancers?"

“We just lost Church,” the other Blue, Tucker, tries. “And Tex. Sorta."

“You already lost both of them once,” the same soldier groans.

“But--“

“Two words. Lopez. Donut."

Washington winces. Tucker groans.

“Fine. Fine! You win. Congrats on having such a convincing argument right after being dumped off a cliff.”

“So,” North tries. “Reds?"

“Our armor isn't even _remotely_ red."

==

“How many times have we faked our death now?” South asks. “You think we’ve got a world record?"

“Well,” North starts, “we left the Project and went MIA, if that counts. Then we were confirmed KIA by Wash after the Meta found us the first time, then again at Sidewinder."

“Nice,” one of the Reds says appreciatively. The one next to him nods. South really needs to learn names besides “orange,” “nerd,” and “shouts a lot.”

“Wash might have us beat, but that’s not bad,” South says. “Everyone needs some excitement.”

“Yeah!” Theta shouts. “Let’s do something exciting. Let’s go attack the Blues!"

“You’re not allowed to talk to the commander,” South sighs, wincing at Theta’s shouting in her brain.

North laughs.

==

Donut tries to get her to come shopping. She admires his bravery.

“Get hair dye,” she tells him. He beams.

==

“I’m going to find the Director,” Carolina says. “And I’m going to kill him."

“ _Jesus_ ,” South says. “How can we help?"

“I knew you’d like the sound of that."

“When don’t I like the sound of violence? Theta, cover your ears,” she adds. “Along with a good ass kicking."

Carolina looks surprised. “You still have your AI?"

“Somehow,” South shrugs. “Didn’t for a few months, but he’s back where he’s supposed to be."

“Can I uncover my ears?” Theta asks.

“Sure, kid. C’mon, let’s go get Wash."

==

South finds Carolina staring at her helmet.

“Hey,” she tries. Theta waves from her shoulder. Carolina looks up, eyebrows raised.

“Hey,” she replies. “Sorry we haven’t gotten to talk much. Washington is the main line I have to Blue Team, and that’s where Epsilon..."

“Don’t worry about it, dude,” South replies, sitting in the dirt next to her. Everyone had taken a rest break, something about “stretching their legs” and “getting out of the damn warthog before I put someone in a chokehold”.

“‘Don’t worry’? That’s unlike you,” Carolina says. It sounds almost like a question. South figures it’s all she’s going to get.

“Well, we’ve all changed a lot in the past few years. You can’t stress everything when you’re dealing with a six year old.” She tilts her head and grins. “Besides, you’ve got enough to worry about.”

“You’re not wrong,” Carolina sighs. “And, just so you know, I’m sorry."

“For what? If it’s about all the shouting, I get it. It’s like trying to herd cats in zero gravity around here."

“No, not that. It’s just... I wasn’t always very nice to you during the Project. Looking back on it, most of it was uncalled for."

“Dude, so what if you were a bitch years ago? So was I. We were all cruel and rude and underhanded. That board didn’t help.” South sighs, leaning back. “I’m sorry too, just so you know. But what brings this on? You haven’t said anything until now.”

“Epsilon showed me something. And I realized things could have been a lot worse. And what if I didn’t apologize now, while I can, and something happened? It’s happened too many times already.”

“Hey, ‘Lina? You can’t change what happened. Most of our friends are dead somewhere, and most of them never even got a proper goodbye, but we can’t change it, you know? And I agree with you, it sucks a lot, but if what-ifs tear you apart things get way worse.” South sighs. “Meta-level worse."

“Yeah, I know. You’re right. When did you get so good at advice?” Carolina’s face is slowly backing away from tears territory, but South still worries. “I thought North was the one that was good at that."

“I guess I’ve just had time to reflect or something, I dunno. Having someone else going through your thoughts really does help with self-reflection.” She pauses. “And Carolina?"

“Yes?"

“We both had legacies to look up to, in the Project. You can either get suffocated or let it go. Learn to coexist. And hey, girls gotta stick together."

“Thank you,” Carolina says.

“No problem."

“I hope you feel better,” Theta adds. South doesn’t know who it’s meant for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> churned all of this out today, somehow. the power of procrastination.
> 
> As always, comments / questions welcome!! I love talking character / plot / etc. stuff.


	5. redemption

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Talking is necessary, occasionally. South still isn't used to it.

Emotional conversations, South discovered, didn't stop Carolina's shouting for long. If she hadn't been there to witness it-- along with having Theta's transcriptions of her audio logs, okay, so _maybe_ she was a little paranoid, it'd been a long few years-- she wouldn't have believed it had even happened.

More shouting from Carolina means more shouting from the Simulation Troopers.

North finds his sister teaching Theta all the swear words she knows.

"What happened to 'cover your ears'?” he asks, vaguely horrified.

"Every other word that comes out of these idiots' mouths is something horrific. Makes log transcripts a bitch to read when Theta substitutes half the words for asterisks," South sighs. "Plus, he's growing up. Might as well teach him before the Blues get the chance."

"You sound like the Sargent.” North, for all his friendly behavior, still sounds awkward talking about their newfound team, stilted speech giving him away easily.

"Better that than sounding like that Tucker asshole. Theta, you can only say the word 'bitch' if you say 'stone cold' or 'boss ass' before it."

"Alright!"

North groans. “Who let you become a parental figure?”

“The same dude we’re trying to find and kill. We’re not very child-friendly."

==

"Hey."

"Yeah?"

"You ever wonder why we're here?"

It's Grif, she notices from her seat in the Warthog. She'd found a stash of old fashion magazines, and had been going through them for a couple of hours. The teams were stopped for the night, much to Carolina's annoyance. She had let everyone know it, too.

"Isn't that question usually reserved for Dick?” The name isn't even all that funny, she knows, but it annoys him, and it annoys Grif, and South enjoys it when Grif tries to explain why it annoys him more than it annoys Simmons.

"Whatever, he's on watch. Watching for _what_ , I have no idea."

"Bears," Theta suggests. He’d been reading over South’s shoulder, but had stopped to listen to their conversation.

"Sure, bears," Grif sighs. "I meant you, specifically, though. You have a brother and an AI, why not just go MIA again? Open a coffee shop in Russia?"

South shrugs. "There are some things you can't leave alone, even if that means hiking through miles of wilderness just to kill your old boss. North always says it feels like he's being haunted."

"Ghosts are assholes," Grif says. South doesn't ask about Church.

"You're a zombie, and Maroon's half robot. This team's a half-baked horror film, I swear to god."

"Yeah, maybe we are. I'm gonna go keep the cyborg company, leave you to your magazines and possible crisis."

"Says you, mister ' _you ever wonder why we're here_ ’."

==

"I have the feeling we're collectively getting our shit together," South says. Washington startles from his seat beside her.

"What-- oh. Yeah, I guess." It sounds like a question.

"You 'guess'? No guessing, 'Lina might eat you if you guess wrong.” That is not a lecture South wanted to sit through again.

"I mean, _we're_ figuring stuff out. The Reds and Blues have had long enough to fix all of their own problems." As if asked, Sarge starts shouting and waving his shotgun.

"You were saying?" South asks, grinning.

"Stop that, you sound like Carolina. And that's less... destructive than our problems. Sure, it’s an old man with a shotgun, but I'd prefer an angry old man over years of pent-up rage."

It makes them both stop. Wash tenses. South is reminded of late nights on the training room floor.

"An angry old man, huh? What do you think the Director is going to _be_?"

"Just- shit. I don't know. Nothing like Sarge, probably. This has all been a mess, and it was sort of fixing itself when she came back from the dead, and- and I don't know, I guess. I just don't."

South winces. "Want Theta? He's good with repressed emotions. Helped my angry ass out, though that took awhile and I tried to delete him a few times."

"What? _No_ \- no. Sorry, but I'm still not-"

"It's cool. Not gonna be sadistic and make you. North would be pissed."

"Thanks," Wash says dryly. "And, as long as we're clearing everything up, what happened to you two? No offense, but I thought that plane would have crashed."

"Our relationship isn't like _Lost_ , dude. Besides, after we left the Project, who was I supposed to be pissed at? Theta didn't do it, as much as I wanted to make myself believe that. North never even got an AI. Who was there left to hate, myself? Sure, I could have left Theta with North and thrown myself off a cliff. But then what?"

"Well, you probably would have died?"

"Yeah, dumbass, how did you figure that out? I meant with the Meta. North can't survive without me. He's a baby. And I have a bucket list."

Wash snorted. "Yeah, alright. At least he sets his trackers."

"Do _not_ tell Carolina about that, she'll kill me if she finds out I still-"

"Hey, Carolina!”

“You’re _dead to me_ \--"

==

Their journey continues. They find Connie's helmet, and South refuses to look at it.

"She was an idiot," she hisses to herself. Theta blinks worriedly above her bowed head. "Saving us, what kind of _martyr_ did she think she was, the _asshole_ -"

North finds her. She throws her helmet at him. He lets her sit and grieve.

==

"Alright. An army of Tex-es."

"Texases?" Theta tries. “Tex-i?"

"Please focus on the shield," South says. "I want to live."

==

The Director is dead. South can feel it, a hollow space in between her armor and her suit, even though Carolina hasn't returned yet. She wonders who did it.

" _Play it again_ ," Wash and Epsilon hiss at the same time. They stare at each other. Theta winces.

They all still have a long way to go. North looks at her. She stares back and wonders if Connie can feel it, too, if Maine’s helmet is stirring at the bottom of the sea.

==

"So," Carolina starts, "want to talk?"

"About?" South laughs. “There’s a lot of jacked up shit that we could discuss. Most of it I don’t want to hear about."

“I didn’t think that far ahead,” she admits.

“What? That’s a new one. Seriously, did you hit your head or something? You sound like Wash trying to impersonate you."

“No. No, I didn’t, I just-- I figured a few things out. Though I wish it didn’t have to come to what it did."

“We all do,” South mutters. “You get out from under the rock that was the Director’s legacy, then?"

Carolina nods, silent. 

“I think so,” she says, finally.

“We were almost the same,” South says. “Me, you, the Director. Almost. Thank God I dodged that bullet."

Carolina flinches at that. South grimaces. “Shit, shit, sorry-"

“No,” she says, “it’s alright. I’m going to talk to Washington, I think. Have a good night."

It’s not a great night, but she gives Theta to North and stays up sparring with Wash. Whatever works, she thinks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> finally sat down and wrote!! had a final this week, but my other two aren't for a couple more weeks, so I might get another chapter out before then. 
> 
> comments / questions always appreciated!!


	6. chorus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> South isn't quite sure what she expected.

“Home?” South asks. “Holy shit.”

North snorts from his place on the floor. He’d been cleaning his sniper rifle- even when there was nothing to shoot at, he still went through the motions. Take it apart, clean it, put it back together. Old habits die hard, he always told her. 

“Yeah. Well, there's going to be a ceremony, but after that we’re clear to go back home."

“Dog?” Theta asks, appearing over South’s shoulder. She grins; they’re going _home_ , and home means dogs and an actual bed and all sorts of things.

“Dog,” South says. “Where are we even going?” They’d both joined the military right after high school- it was South’s idea, North reluctantly tagging along after her. Neither of them had anticipated serving longer than a few years, but then the Project had taken an interest in them. With their recruitment went the chance of either of them ever picking up their life where they’d left it.

Well, maybe not. South sighs. “Connie always suggested that we get an apartment in San Francisco. Don’t know where she thought you’d be. Nearby, probably, being a mother hen."

“That or dead, hard to tell with her. We still have a while to figure everything out, though. We can talk more on the ride back." North smiles, and she grins easily back. 

_Home_ , she thinks. 

==

They don’t talk about it, after that.

Instead, South fools around on the return flight until alarms start blaring, and then she’s pulling herself out of a pile of rubble and swearing. Theta buzzes worriedly in her skull.

“I don’t think this is San Fran,” she groans. She hears Wash laugh from a few feet away, though it sounds more like a wheeze.

In the end, they’re all mostly unscathed, nothing worse than a few broken ribs and bruises. There are a few empty bases nearby, and they’re fairly useable. South isn’t too worried about that, though. Instead, she impatiently climbs up one of the rock faces surrounding the camp. Above her, Carolina waits, looking down at her. The curve of her helmet looks like a smile.

“And where are you heading off to? I’m guessing you aren’t going off to look for supplies."

“Freelancer tech,” Carolina says simply. “Gonna go track it down. Why, you coming along?"

“Hell yeah,” South says. “Already told North, too- you weren’t even gonna tell anybody anything? That’s cold.”

“I don’t really like goodbyes."

“Well, I told everyone bye for us. Let’s go party.”

==

The next few months are the most fun South has had since she was still a Freelancer agent. Sure, she’s _done stuff_ since then, but it usually involved running from murderers or babysitting.

Fighting is more simple than anything. Punch, kick, duck or get your head blown off. Epsilon appreciates the help, Carolina tells her, even if Theta is usually talking about animals and rolling around on his skateboard the whole time he's decoding anything.

South never manages the balance that she’s used to fighting with her brother, but Carolina is a good substitute. These pirates are smart, but they’re not Freelancers. Or an army of Tex robots. Still, they’re dangerous enough to be good fun. Nothing like a gun to the head to get your blood flowing.

==

“ _How_ do they manage to get themselves in trouble every time we’re gone?” South hisses impatiently. Carolina hushes her. She can’t wait for this orange asshole to stop talking. These two’ll actually present a challenge, which is the best news she’s gotten since Command told her she got to go home and not wear power armor seven days a week.

Pointy Helmet finally stops chattering, and South doesn’t need to be asked twice. The two assholes get away, but the Sim Troopers’ surprise when they realized who she was keeps her from punching anyone too hard. Besides, there was a new member of their group- a woman who recognized the value of purple power armor.

==

“We got info,” South gloats, ignoring the screams coming from somewhere above them. “Red Team rules."

“We got a hostage.” Carolina’s sitting on the ground next to her, her bad leg propped up with her helmet.

“Who isn’t talking."

“Not talking, you say?” Dr. Grey’s helmet poked out from the building, twirling a pair of scissors in her right hand. “Actually, I have some news you all just might want to hear!"

Wash and Carolina take over, asking the hostage- Miller, South remembers him shouting- all the questions they could think of. They’re interrupted by more space pirates, though, and Miller dies before he can tell them anything else.

“Really? You accepted a chip that the creepy soldier gave you, kept it even _after_ he revealed he was evil, and then gave it to _Caboose_?"

Washington’s horrific sentimentality aside, everyone manages to escape, winding up at a small refueling station in the middle of the desert. Wash still won’t look anyone in the eye.

==

The tracking unit is removed quickly enough, though South’s too preoccupied with chasing drama to really care.

“Be considerate,” North tells her. “You wouldn’t want anyone following you around when we’re fighting.”

“I’m not following anyone! The only thing I did was ask ‘Lina what was happening. I heard yelling, I was _concerned_."

“That is the least believable thing you’ve said since we landed here.” North sighs. South can feel the eye roll; it’s a skill they’ve all developed.

She snorts. “Whatever, I’ll stop sticking my nose into shit. With a war going on, I’m sure there’s other forms of entertainment."

“We could play soccer,” Theta suggests. “Or frisbee.”

“Where are we gonna find either of those things in a refueling station?"

==

Felix gives them an offer they can’t refuse. Well, South assumes that’s what he was going for.

“This is a trap and we are gonna eat shit and die if we go to the crash site,” South says.

It takes some arguing, but they all eventually come up with a plan. It’s ridiculous and complicated, but there’s not much else that they can do. Theta hums as the Freelancers and Sim Troopers make the journey to the radio jammer.

==

Honestly, South isn’t surprised Carolina and Wash wanted to go after the mercs themselves. They’re both dramatics at heart, and South isn’t in a position to stop either of them. Carolina had her camouflage, and it wasn’t like her bubble shield would be much help against two skilled mercenaries. 

That leaves the twins, along with most of the troopers, with cleanup duty. South would be more annoyed, if cleanup didn’t mean fighting next to North again.

Sure, Freckles is pretty beastly, but the Dakotas are a force of nature. The pirates are good, sure, that’s why they were hired- why they’re still alive- but they couldn’t match two Freelancers. South almost felt bad for them. 

“Remember when you shot that dude in half? That was badass.” South grins as the nearby pirates stumble back in fear, though they can’t get far before her gun tears through them.

“That I do. Switch,” he calls, throwing his gun at her. It’s no sniper rifle, but it can still do the job. She tosses her gun back to him and finishes her job.

==

No one dies, which is a success. South wonders when that became her marker for success, survival over the mission. The Project had tried to get them all to tear themselves apart with that scoreboard, prioritizing their mission over everything. That’s why Connie had died, and the mission had still failed, in the end.

You can’t get rid of a self-preservationist streak, South guesses. That’s why all the living Freelancers aren’t in an unmarked grave with the rest of them.

She vaguely wishes Donald Doyle had been a war causality. Kimball can be brash, but so can South; she appreciates a leader who won’t let her people down. Doyle isn’t meant to be leading an army, and it shows. Theta interrupts her thoughts gently, poking at her mind.

“Epsilon told me to get you,” he says, avatar floating a few inches from her nose. “He said he and Carolina found something big."

==

Malcom Hargrove.

South would love to string him up from the rafters, to give him a piece of her mind, but one of the other Freelancers will probably get to him first. The room they’re filming in is thick with tension, and Carolina’s shoulders are as stiff as they’d been when she’d first come to the Sim Troopers. Everyone but her is standing up straight; she lets herself slouch, arms crossed. The old man doesn’t deserve the respect, she thinks. Parade rest reminds her of the Director, and neither he nor anyone associated with him is allowed her full attention.

Here, miles away in the middle of a war she isn’t supposed to be fighting, with a life that should’ve ended years ago, it’s the best revenge she has.

==

After they confront Hargrove, the front on Chorus goes eerily quiet. There are still battles, of course, and they’re not small skirmishes, but the mercs are nowhere to be found. Tensions are high at the base, with the Federal Army and Rebel soldiers still biting at each other’s heels.

Alien towers, apparently, help relieve that pressure.

“Tourist attractions,” South grumbles. “Giant towers! What’s next, dragons? ‘ _Oh yeah, they’re everywhere this time of year, no worries. Got a picture with one when I was a kid_.’ Christ.”

“Maybe the aliens were dragons."

“Shut up, Tucker."

==

“So, you saw an alien and got a map? What is this, a b-rate scifi flick?"

“Regardless,” Kimball says, “we now have a map, and Charon’s weapons are all but destroyed. We can’t waste this opportunity."

“Well, there’s a tractor beam with our name on it."

They make their way towards Crash Site Alpha, Theta humming the _Star Wars_ theme.

==

The battle at Alpha goes about as well as it could have.

They get ambushed, because of course they do, and backup is late due to whatever the _fuck_ is going on at the jungle temple. South isn’t sure she wants to know, but surely it can’t be as stressful as _this_ mess. Though, given who it’s happening to, maybe it can. Never doubt a Sim Trooper’s ability to get into trouble, even in the middle of the jungle.

Currently, they’re all holed up in the wreckage of the ship. Theta gives her their probability of coming out unscathed, given the heavy fire outside. It doesn’t look too great. Then again, it never does, but she still has all her limbs and most of her common sense.

“I have an idea,” Washington says. It’s a stupid fucking idea.

“That’s a stupid fucking idea,” South tells him, in case he’s not aware. “Your helmet is on your head for a reason, and it isn’t to hide that ugly dye job."

The lieutenants are startled into laughter. She can feel Wash’s glare. “At least I didn’t get smashed and dye my tips purple. With Kool-Aid.”

She flips him off. “Still looks more natural than that hot mess you call blonde."

“Uh, guys?” One of the lieutenants asks. “The, uh, plan?"

It works. South isn’t happy.

==

“Santa,” South says. “Christ almighty."

“Christmas almighty?” Theta asks. South can hear the grin in his voice.

“I will kill you, and I won’t regret it."

“There was a test,” Carolina says. She sounds shaken, even now. “We had to go into a portal, face our fears. It wasn’t pleasant."

South snorts. “Yeah, don’t think it was supposed to be fun. Sorry you had to go through that shit, though."

Carolina sighs. “We all have to face those fears some day. I just didn’t think an alien named Santa would make me.”

“ _Santa_."

==

The shouting match Kimball and Doyle are having is making South crave popcorn.

“We need t-shirts,” she whispers to North. He grins, and Kimball glares at him. South continues unabashedly. “I’m team Kimball."

“I don’t think anyone is dumb enough to wear a shirt that says ‘Team Doyle’ where she could see it,” North whispers back. South nods.

“Maybe not, but now I’d pay to see it happen.”

The argument escalates enough to where Wash is basically pulling the two leaders apart- well, pulling Kimball off of a cowering Doyle. Washington scolds them like an angry mother, South thinks. It’s a shame, she’d really wanted to see how Kimball ended her argument-turned-string-of-insults.

==

“Therapy session?” South groans. “Didn’t we just deal with this? I don’t want to have to witness Disappointed Mom Wash again for at least a week. I have to deal with that shit daily when it comes to North."

“I’ve gotten better!” he protests. South snorts.

Surprisingly, no blood is drawn. Less surprisingly, the space pirates come back with a vengeance.

“Space pirates,” Theta says, “like Han Solo?”

“What does that make us, Stormtroopers? Is Felix Leia?"

From somewhere behind her, Carolina and Kimball laugh.

==

“Sharkface?” South asks. “Who the fuck is _that_?”

“A friend we made getting the Sarcophagus,” Wash tells her. He sounds out of breath. “You know, flamethrower?"

“No, I don’t know,” South hisses, “because the Director fucking _grounded me_ and didn’t let me go on that mission.”

“Consider yourself lucky. He’s pissed."

“So am I!"

==

Somehow, they all make it onto the Pelican. South follows Carolina onto the roof of the ship, grinning wildly.

“North got his chance to look cool, now we get ours!"

Two bubbles are better than one, she thinks. _Can I call you Double Bubble again?_ Theta asks her, voice vibrating oddly in her skull.

“No fuckin’ way,” she mumbles, promptly passing out.

==

If South is honest, she misses the sword more than she misses Doyle. Sure, she appreciates what he did- it was a noble sacrifice- but it would have been smarter to leave someone else behind.

Someone that didn’t hold the sword that was needed to activate the Doom Temple, for example. Just maybe.

The Feds are taking the loss much harder than she is, that’s for sure. Tensions are sky high once again, like that dumb speaking-ball session had never even happened. Kimball’s taking it like a champ, though. When she gives her speech, South is cheering louder than anyone. Theta brings his fireworks.

==

“I hate babysitting,” South grumbles. “All that excitement, that kickass speech, and I have to watch a bunch of trigger happy toddlers?"

“You take care of Theta, don’t you?” a lieutenant asks her. Red accents is who, Jensen? “Isn’t he a child?"

“Yeah, but one that’s helped me live through more battles than you can imagine,” she replies easily. “And he doesn’t need to eat. Or use the bathroom."

“You have an odd view of caregiving,” Dr. Grey tells her. “Is it related to your older brother? Oh, I’ve been wanting to do a psych study on twins for _years_ -"

“I am right here, you know,” North says.

“Whatever,” South says. Grey giggles.

==

They activate the tractor beams without a problem. The Tartarus crashes back into Chorus, wiping out the Purge Temple. Behind her, the lieutenants cheer.

She feels lighter, through she can’t quite place why.

==

Sneaking onto a ship to kick the shit out of Malcom Hargrove is the most ridiculous, dangerous plan she’s heard today. It’s the Sim Troopers, though. They’ll be fine, she thinks, and Theta’s presence in her skull agrees. He’s humming again.

From the _Staff of Charon_ , Epsilon begins broadcasting.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's 2.5k as a "sorry for taking a month and a half to update" present. 
> 
> Well, that's the end of this story! As my first multichaptered fic, I can definitely say I've learned a lot. Thank you all for reading and commenting! I'll probably be writing more rvb in the future, so let me know if there's anything you really want to see from me. <3


End file.
